To Moms From Moms: Encouraging You to Keep on Keeping on

Are you a mom who is blind, or do you have a child who is blind or visually impaired? Wish there was someone out there who understood what you are going through? Then you have come to the right place. To celebrate that special and often complicated bond between mother and child, we have gathered inspirational quotes from moms who have been there and done that and who have lived to tell the tale. But, before that, here’s some interesting tidbits copied from www.history.com

“The clearest modern precedent for Mother’s Day is the early Christian festival known as “Mothering Sunday.” Once a major tradition in the United Kingdom and parts of Europe, this celebration fell on the fourth Sunday in Lent and was originally seen as a time when the faithful would return to their “mother church”—the main church in the vicinity of their home—for a special service.

Over time the Mothering Sunday tradition shifted into a more secular holiday, and children would present their mothers with flowers and other tokens of appreciation. This custom eventually faded in popularity before merging with the American Mother’s Day in the 1930s and 1940s.”

I don’t know about you, but I rather like the thought of returning to a home church with mama. But, since I can’t give out flowers or small gifts to all you moms out there, let me try and encourage you with words. Read on and remember, you are not alone.

"You see a lot more when you're Blind than you can when your eyesight is 20/20. You don't need eyesight to see how beautiful children are. Beauty doesn't fool you when you're Blind. Blindness opens one's ears. Eyesight can blind you to the beauty around you. Being blind is no worse than being left-handed. You can do anything anyone else can do, and sometimes even better. There are worse things than being blind. It's your choice, and only yours, whether you are going to be positive or negative about being blind.” -Shirley Emerick, a mom who is blind

“Try to let them explore the world as if they had eye sight. Expose them to everything/anything so they won't be afraid. I have done this with my daughter. Let them know just because you don't have eye sight doesn't mean you can't try or can't do it .” -Deanna Toup Willis, a mom of a child who is blind

“My words of encouragement to any other mother raising a child with blindness or low vision would be first and foremost have a sense of humor…if I had a dime for every time I ran my son into a wall or the mirror on the car I would be rich, and you really have to be able to laugh it off. I think It is also extremely important to always, always, always be encouraging to your child no matter what! My son tells me often that when he gets older he is going to drive me around so I don't have to do all of the driving.  No matter how impossible this may be it is my job as a parent to encourage And support my son in anything he wants to do or be. There have been many times that I have thought that he couldn’t do something, and he has proven me wrong. Be positive and encourage because you don't want your child to have the I can't mentality." -Shannon Kuncl, a mom of a child who is blind

“My mom never treated me any different than my sighted siblings, so I never thought that I could not be a mom. Being blind does not define the type of mother you can be. It does, however make things difficult, so you have to find different ways of doing things. So, just get your hands in there, get messy and git ‘er done. And, when you feel overwhelmed, just put them in the bath tub. LOL” -Keela Harper, a mom who is blind

“When my 18-month-old daughter had to have a cataract removed, I remember sitting in the waiting room, worrying. The doctors told me how long it would take, but it was taking much longer. About to panic, I asked the nurse what was going on. Turns out, when they went to remove the cataract, it fell apart, and they had to take it out piece by piece. What got me through those rough days was my mom. At my side at the hospital, going with me to my daughter's doctor appointments, she never missed a one, and she never missed an opportunity to pray. I don’t know what I would have done without Mom there to support me.” -Pam Hamrick, mom of a child with a visual impairment

“I was 16 when my oldest daughter was born. Right away the doctors notice something was wrong with her eyes. I practically lived at the hospital, and if it had not been for my mom and dad, I would never have made it. Mom brought me food from home, and both she and Dad took turns holding my baby who never stopped crying. Mom and Dad were the ones the doctors talked to, figuring since I was so young, I couldn’t possibly know what they were talking about. The nurses were kinder, though, sometimes bringing me something to drink or eat. I would say that the support from Mom and Dad, plus the trust I placed in God brought me through. And, despite the fact I did not have any experience, I raised my daughter to believe she could do whatever she set her mind to do.” -Robin Johnson, a mom of a child who is blind

“As a blind mother, I've learned that our children gain advantages from the blindness of their parents. They communicate as fully as possible, even when they don't. But perhaps more importantly, they accept difference as a default part of the human experience.” -Kristen Witucki, a mom who is blind

Reading over all this advice and encouragement, I wondered if I would be able to add anything. After all, I am a blind woman with 2 sighted children. Then, a memory popped into my head. I remember the day when my oldest daughter was 14 months old and sitting in her high chair. She had just finished eating a bowl of instant oatmeal, the flavored kind. She had not been feeling well, and I guess the oatmeal was too much, because without any warning, her stomach rejected the sugary instant breakfast. Victims of this rejection included my daughter and all her clothes, the high chair tray and seat cover, the bowl and spoon, the stuffed Elmo she insisted on carrying around, my shirt, my pants and the floor. By far, it was one of the worst messes I’d ever been faced with. Of course, the poor baby started crying, and for a brief moment, I stood in my kitchen with all that mess and had no idea what to do next. So, I said out loud, “Lord, I don’t have a clue how to clean this up and calm her down. So, if you want me to be a good mom, you got to show me how.”

My point here is that life can be rough, and if you are a mom, whether sighted or blind, raising kids does not come with a manual. We are often overwhelmed and feel like we just can’t do it anymore. But, as I said earlier in this post, we are not alone. I hope what these moms have had to say encourages you, whether you deal with blindness or not.

To end today’s post, I want to leave you with a devotion written by a mom whose daughter is blind and has other difficulties with her health. Be blessed, be encouraged and have a fabulous Mother’s Day.

A Mother’s Anguish

by Linda Reece

In the best of times, mothers tend to be hard on themselves for the occasional displeasing condition of things. When the house is a mess. When dinner is overcooked. We even feel responsible when one of our kids gets poor grades on a test. We believe that just about everything our hands touch should be perfect, or at least near perfect. And so it is when our babies are born with serious health issues. Surely, this must have happened because of something we did or didn’t do. It’s our fault. That was my state of mind when our daughter was born prematurely and she was later diagnosed with various eye problems that rendered her legally blind. This must have somehow been my fault.

My guilt was heavy. I felt ashamed. I wasn’t able to share these feelings with anyone, not even my own mother. But it wasn’t long until I found out that she did know and understand. The revelation came in the mail. It was a simple card that contained a page torn from a small meditation booklet that Mother used every day for her devotions. The scripture reading was from the Gospel of John, chapter 9, verses 1-3. And passing by, Jesus saw a man who was blind from birth. “And his disciples asked him, saying, “Master, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus answered, “Neither has this man nor his parents sinned, but that the works of God might be revealed in him.” I read that passage over and over again. Although I had not fully understood its entire meaning, the heart of it penetrated my pain and relieved me of the anguish I had been feeling for months. My daughter’s condition was not my fault!

In the years that followed, of course, I learned more of God’s mysterious ways. The passage that my dear mother had shared with me became clearer. Sometimes the calamities that come upon us are our fault. Bad choices in life can result in bad outcomes. But often these calamities come due to our living in a fallen world where the devil has a limited amount of control over what happens to us. God’s “mysterious ways” is working through these calamities. As we learn to trust him more and more, no matter our condition, the world sees the love of God shine through us. We become a testimony for how to overcome whatever life throws our way.

This Mother’s Day, dare to celebrate a messy house and overcooked dinners. Stop blaming yourself for everything! And, by all means, praise the Lord for that precious blind child he gave into your care. Trust him to work his work through you and through him/her. Allow God’s light to shine through you both.